Archive for the ‘Psychology’ Category

Sharing or Despairing

December 1, 2011

I’ve made a hobby of collecting inspiring stories.  When I interview amazing people on my show, I’ve noticed that every single story without exception has a hard part in the middle.  These hard parts of life create a choice.  The choice is between sharing and despairing.  When you focus on your problem as if it is all about you, get ready for some serious despair.  When you realize that your problem has something to do with assisting others who have similar problems, and you get busy sharing what you’ve learned and how you’ve grown, life takes on new meaning and purpose.  I am so grateful for good people who are willing to share – it helps me feel less crazy and more hopeful in my own challenges.  Sharing or despairing – it’s your choice!
 
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Recognize that each of us has the power to change the way react to the situations we face in life.
 
Marc Muchnick

Chewable Chunks

July 20, 2011

When you take on life’s challenges it can seem overwhelming at times to even begin.  Looking at the entire project can be so daunting that you shrink from the task altogether.  Vicki and I just started cleaning out the “junk room” in the basement.  We were feeling a little this way, but realized that if we just start and take on small bits at a time, it becomes very do-able.  Take a look at that daunting task that you have been avoiding.  What little piece can you take on now?  Don’t worry about doing everything, just do something!
 

Failure is not fatal, but failure to change might be.
John Wooden

Watch Your Language

July 12, 2011

The language that we choose makes a big difference, and can completely change our experience.  I got two great examples last night as I was reading John Maxwell’s Failing Forward.  Do your challenges in life make you bitter or better?  Does adversity lead to breakdowns or breakthroughs?  Then this morning with one of my clients we were discussing letting go.  Letting go is different from giving up.  If what you want is not yet in your hand, and your hand is clenched so tightly around what you already have, how can you receive what you want?  Letting go is often the crucial step toward receiving what you want, because it opens your hands, heart, and mind to what can be.

Very often a change of self is needed more than a change of scene.

Arthur Christopher Benson

Weeds Thrive Too

June 1, 2011

After a very rainy May here in Utah, my little garden is thriving and growing well.  I also have a weed patch in a neglected spot that is thriving and growing well.  Our minds are like the fertile earth, ready and willing to return an abundance of whatever we plant and cultivate there.  But be careful – weeds are default.  If you don’t intentionally plant productive and positive thoughts, you may soon find the place overgrown with weeds of negativity, fear, and doubt.

Every thought is a seed.  If you plant crab apples, don’t count on harvesting golden delicious.

– Bill Meyer 

Whatever Doesn’t Look Like That

April 19, 2011

Soap Circle

I was just looking at this chain that I whittled out of a family sized bar of Ivory soap.  The most common question I get about this after people marvel that I would have that much extra time on my hands is, “How did you do that?”  The answer is simple, I just cut off everything that doesn’t look like that.  Our lives tend to accumulate a lot of extra baggage from time to time.  Get a clear picture of what you want your life to look like, and start cutting off whatever doesn’t look like that!
 

 

Ability is what you’re capable of doing.
Motivation determines what you do.
Attitude determines how well you do it.
Lou Holtz 
 
 
Dr. Paul

Mind Meals

January 27, 2011
One of my clients is a very successful corporate executive who engaged in a six-session life coaching process with me.  After our very first session, this man called me on the phone and said, “Paul, it’s like my mind was hungry for this.”  Many of us don’t realize that we feed our minds daily – the question becomes WHAT do we feed our minds.  To intentionally consume mind food that inspires, uplifts, enlightens, and encourages will go far toward assisting you to remain in a paradigm of positivity and production.
 
If you would hit the mark, you must aim a little above it; every arrow that flies feels the attraction of earth.
– Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
 
P.S.  The cafeteria is open – please enjoy the Mind Meals available at no cost to you through Live On Purpose Radio – Bon Apetit!

Mind The Gap

November 5, 2010

When you compare how you are doing with the ideal, how do you feel? Common words my clients share with me are “frustrated”, “inadequate”, “depressed”, or “discouraged”. Dan Sullivan of The Strategic Coach teaches that this is because of “The Gap”. The gap is defined as the permanent distance between your reality and the ideal. On the other hand, when you compare how you are doing to how you have done in the past, how do you feel? Common words to describe this scenario are, “encouraged”, “accomplished”, “satisfied”, or “pleased.” You get to choose the standard by which you measure your progress – Mind the Gap!

Swing hard, in case they throw the ball where you’re swinging.
– Duke Snider

Failing Forward

September 16, 2010

I’m enjoying reading John C. Maxwell’s book Failing Forward.  Failure is an almost universal fear.  I say “almost” because the truly successful people in life have a very different view of failure.  Maxwell points out that one of the greatest problems people have with failure is that they are too quick to judge isolated situations in their lives and label them as failures.  Instead, they need to keep the bigger picture in mind.  Whether you call what is happening in your life or what has happened in your life as a failure is up to you and you alone.  You have the power to label your experience as failure or as a powerful learning experience – choose!

The difference between greatness and mediocrity is often how an individual views a mistake.

– Nelson Boswell

Camels and Change

September 2, 2010

Several years ago, Vicki and I visited the Canary Islands in connection with an evaluation I was doing in a child custody matter.  While we were there, we rode a camel.  I learned that camels have the interesting tendency to grumble and complain with every command that the wrangler issued.  He would command them to kneel so the rider could mount up – and the camel would grumble and complain.  He then commanded them to stand, and again grumbling and complaining.  Basically anything that represented a change brought on the attitude.  How are you handling the changes in your life?  Remember, better is always different.  Look at the changes in your life as amazing opportunities to experience something better, rather than just grumbling and complaining about having to move.

Yesterday’s Tomorrow

July 21, 2010
As I was meeting with a client this week she shared today’s quote with me:  “Today is the tomorrow that you were afraid of yesterday.”  Here it is, and there you are still handling everything as it comes.  At the root of every fear is the same belief – that I can’t handle it.  Nothing could be farther from the truth – you have already handled absolutely everything so far, and that will not be changing.  Keep moving forward and know that you can handle it!

Today is the tomorrow that you were afraid of yesterday.

-Anonymous